There’s two things that brought sudden understanding to me, and the first one is probably more of a shock to YOU, dear readers.
A week ago, I spent two days in jail. I did know this was coming, though.
The second thing was more of a shock to ME, although it wasn’t a total surprise. It was more that things sunk in on a deeper level.
Wednesday night, discussing details of a family get-together for my son’s birthday, I realized that my mother really is a narcissist. Again, I don’t think she’s a textbook case of NPD, and her narcissism is definitely of the covert variety, but I can’t describe her controlling antics as borderline narcissism anymore. It IS narcissism, and discussing things with one of my sisters (who lives in town) made it that more concrete for me. In other words, she agrees.
I’m not in the best space for writing– and yes, I reckon I’m piquing your interest. I will write more later. It is upsetting, and it is disappointing. But I knew this… practically forever, and I mean forever on a very esoteric level, especially if any of you have read ..the father becomes the son.