the tao of jaklumen

the path of the sage must become the path of the hero


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Inactivity.

Yes, it’s been a year and a half since I’ve written here.

The post A shout-out for new followers… still applies. Chronic/persistent pain is such a terrible beast.

Then there is Binge eating — one of the last of my dirty little secrets. I’m going to meet with an RDN once again. I have to do it with the intent of diabetes education, first and foremost, because health insurance simply demands it be that way. But I got a referral to meet with someone who also has training and expertise in treating eating disorders. To sum up the post, yes, I got diagnosed with binge eating disorder by a previous RDN I was seeing for diabetes education. I went on to look into bariatric weight loss surgery, specifically the sleeve (think of it as stomach stapling 2.0). I went through the process they have all patients do, up until it was time for me to take a psychological evaluation (which is probably the VERY same one I took before having a trial neurostimulator implanted in my spine- see Electric Fences and Spinal Cord Stim and The trial version of the electric fence). I then decided I needed to get a better handle on my binge eating disorder before having the size of my stomach reduced.

This is all aside from losing weight on my own after many years, dropping from 383 pounds down to 286 the last time I stepped on the digital scale at my physician’s clinic. It didn’t happen all at once. I was at 316 for a long while, but this was after following the counting carbohydrates system the aforementioned RDN taught me- the one that gave me my eating disorder diagnosis. Then I did some intermittent fasting, and my newest physician started me on an injectable diabetes drug.. but I digress.

Then there are new developments that I think will give new posts for the A Blogger’s Journey series. I did start blogging at LiveJournal in 2002 to try to unpack all the abuse my mother heaped on me for many, many years. But it was SEVERAL years before I had a name for a lot of the abuse: narcissistic abuse. And it took me a while to realize that narcissists were ALL OVER my family of origin. Not just my mother, but my maternal grandmother, both my aunts, and at least one cousin. Not unique or unusual, no, but I am coming to understand my particular experience of family dysfunction. I had to find new online communities to better process this, because… I was blacklisted from one I’d been with for about 5 years. That was what Return to Path of the Sage was about, although I was very cryptic at the time. I was scared that I’d catch more ire from the host of that community, or any of her active followers. It’s not a story I wish to recount right now. But it’s the same story I’m referring to here:

Yes, I have a huge winter beard here. It’s not quite that long this winter season… but that’s another story.

Anyways, I hope to get back into the swing of posting again. I wish to welcome new readers! And to one in particular (you know who you are)… do you see what I mean when I told you “oh, this is just the tip of the iceberg”? I mean, I still haven’t mentioned the half of it!

But such is blogging.. I have time to unpack more of it. And finding the right balance to heal and grow, without oversharing, is tough. The masses on the Internet can be pretty vicious, and that’s counting a LOT of stories, including the one about my Internet stalker. I’ll do my best to write more. Thanks for your patience!


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The Inner Journey

Looking back, I suppose it was only a matter of time before I stumbled over references to Christopher Vogel and “The Writer’s Journey“.  This is the guy that wrote the studio memo titled “A Practical Guide to The Hero with a Thousand Faces”, and I gather that his interpretation of Joseph Campbell’s work and its influence on the motion picture industry (he was working for Disney at the time), was what also spawned some criticism I kept running into online.  Apparently, not all screenwriters employ the idea of Monomyth while still flourishing skill and talent for good storytelling.

The Inner Journey

The Inner Journey

The following diagram is from Vogler’s Writer’s Journey site, on the page “Hero’s Journey”.  Masterful!  I wish I’d seen this when writing about the Silver Surfer– it might have made those posts about the inner conflict he experienced (according to Stan Lee) easier.

Of course, my immediate thought was that it would make fitting the Monomyth to my day-to-day struggles much easier as well.  I have gotten a little feedback that all this Monomyth stuff is not easily and quickly digested, so I hope that incorporating this will be helpful, dear readers, or at least easier to skim, as I know many of you are wading through many blogs and posts… you know how it is.

I will probably highlight this diagram much as I have the other one.  Hopefully I can successfully claim fair use, and that Mr. Vogler and his associates will not try to squeeze lawsuit blood from stony impoverished me as I express admiration for his work.