the tao of jaklumen

the path of the sage must become the path of the hero

Tears in the Abyss part 2


I tried really hard to reframe last weekend as a chance for my father to reunite with his brothers.

Still, while his younger brother and his family bring Cimmy and I such joy– his older brother and family still bring me so much frustration.

My father put together several photos of him and his brothers, including one taken that Saturday.  I figured it would be polite to say this:

This is excellent!

I’m sorry I didn’t get to see more of you… my new surgeon has decided I need a few more screws loose (and taken out).

(Dad– I saved a copy of this to Dropbox so I know where it is )

but I really wasn’t expecting this reply:

Jonathan [yes, that’s me]
I’m so sorry I didn’t get you guys an invite. Honestly when I sent your parents the invite I thought about all of you but didn’t state that… so sorry. Let’s for sure do something fun this summer 🙂

[Youngest cousin’s wife]

I don’t know what to do.  Once upon a time, I was so eager to meet her and the kids… but… well, I don’t want to so much now.  They are living with my aunt and uncle now, and that just introduces so much awkwardness.  There is awkwardness with them suddenly breaking off contact with my youngest sister, who has always been my friend.

But this next message I just read a few moments ago was more heartening:

Dear Jon [me, jak] and Julie [Cimmorene],
We are very thankful that we got to spend some time with you two, also.  [Eldest son and his wife, Y] both expressed enjoying getting to see you.  [I hadn’t seen eldest son cousin for many, many years… I don’t think Cimmy had ever met him before.]
[some personal, private matters redacted, but they are asking for us to fast and pray for them]
We just celebrated Y’s birthday on Wednesday.  We all go together and had a picnic.  Y turned 33.  Even though [younger son’s] birthday is on Sunday, the 29th, we are all getting together tomorrow to celebrate.
Tell [Princess] we think her art is something you would see in an animated movie or magazine.  We were thankful to get to meet your children.  [We hadn’t seen them in person since before Princess was born.]
I am really glad that Julie shared her book. I think that art is very powerful.  The one with the good angel and the devil has stayed in my mind the most so far.
We love you.
[Auntie C and Uncle B]

As I’ve said before, they love us unconditionally.

Author: jaklumen

Wherever you see "jaklumen", that's me- the username is still unique as of the current year. Be aware that the facet you see, is only a small part of the me that is me.

5 thoughts on “Tears in the Abyss part 2

  1. Extended family drama can be so difficult to navigate. Good to know that certain members [Auntie C and Uncle B] love you unconditionally. Hold on to the good. Forgive the rest. You cannot control them. Speaking from personal experience of complicated extended family relations — so tragic.


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